Architecture for Us - Stories - What Does A Place For “Mindfulness” Want To Be? (Part 1)
Picture yourself… It’s been a rough day. Really rough. Your afternoon included a long review session with your supervisor. While your previous supervisors have given you rave reviews, this new guy is less charmed. Worse yet, rather than offering you helpful advice he spent most of the meeting simply telling you how lacking you are and how great he is. You rush from his office, frantic to pick up your daughter after school and get her to her music lesson on time. She’s an early student of the trumpet. As you wait in the long line of cars driven by other parents picking up their own sons and daughters you can’t get your boss’s words out of your head, recalling him saying, “You know, when I’m in a meeting I’m always the smartest person in the room. You… well, you don’t have that problem.” Ugh. At once you are concerned about your position. A single mom, you simply can’t lose your job! How will you pay your mortgage? What about your daughter’s music lessons? Oh my! What about health insurance?
Waiting in the long line of cars your engine warning light blinks on. “Of course,” you say to yourself as you repeatedly drum the steering wheel with your fingers. At last you reach the head of the line and your daughter jumps into the car, trumpet in hand. She practices all the way to her lesson. Trumpets are pretty loud. No, that’s not right. Trumpets, especially in the confines of a car, are deafeningly loud. Though you feel your temples beginning to throb, in no way will you squelch your daughter’s enthusiasm by asking her to keep it down.
After dropping her off you stop by the market for a few groceries. Your card is declined… again. Off to the ATM, then back to the store. You feel your face flushing with embarrassment as you pay the cashier.
But oh - at last you arrive home! Your castle. Your relief. A place of solace. You’re greeted at the door by the new pug puppy you recently rescued - “Uhura.” Uhura is really happy to see you and you realize it’s the first time you’ve felt appreciated all day. Now Uhura, well, she’s a puppy and with that comes fresh poop on the rug.
Still, you’re home. In your castle. Your relief. A place of solace. You have two hours before you will need to collect your daughter; plenty of time to “collect” yourself. In recent months you’ve been practicing mindfulness as a way of providing focus and stress relief. If ever there was a day that demanded a little stress relief, this is it…
*********
Oh friends… can relate to our heroine? Have you had days like this? I know I have. As you consider similar experiences you’ve had I ask you to pause for a moment and look around your home. In of itself does it provide relief and solace or conversely does it contribute to your anxiety? Perhaps it simply, blandly exists.
Hmmm… let’s put that “large” question aside and ask instead, is there a place in your home that will enhance your practice of mindfulness? A place you can meditate or perhaps engage the contemplative tradition? Maybe you just need a place you can quietly, calmly read.
Pause now for a moment and look around.
As I discussed in the opening section for these Stories, I believe that Architecture has the ability to enhance the things we are doing. To make our activity more robust, even if that activity is a quest for deep peace. Think about that. A robustly peaceful place in your home. A place that enhances your quest for mindfulness. A place that makes reading better. A place for quiet contemplation. It is not too much to expect.
I’m guessing that as you pause and look around your home you won’t find such a place. If you’re lucky there might be a place that won’t distract from, or impede your practice and quest for peaceful calm. If you’re lucky.
And so we ask ourselves, “what are the characteristics of a good place for mindfulness?” Or, borrowing from one far wiser than I am, “what does a place for mindfulness want to be?” I love that. What does a place for mindfulness want to be? It’s almost a way of seeing a place as being alive. Who knows, perhaps in some ways it is.
Although each of us will have answers to this question that are unique to our own situation and needs, you might be surprised to discover that across a large sample of people there will be many, many similar answers. Within the worlds we create for ourselves we humans often share more than we realize.
What does “a place for mindfulness” want to be? (If mindfulness isn’t your drive, perhaps you prefer meditation or contemplative practice. Or maybe you are looking for a place you can peacefully read or study.) Grab a piece of paper or open your Notes app and jot down five to seven points that strike you as important. For each point write 3 or 4 sentences that explain why it seems important and how you might implement it. Remember, there are no wrong answers.
This might take a while… I’ll wait…
Continues with Part 2
Picture yourself… It’s been a rough day. Really rough. Your afternoon included a long review session with your supervisor. While your previous supervisors have given you rave reviews, this new guy is less charmed. Worse yet, rather than offering you helpful advice he spent most of the meeting simply telling you how lacking you are and how great he is. You rush from his office, frantic to pick up your daughter after school and get her to her music lesson on time. She’s an early student of the trumpet. As you wait in the long line of cars driven by other parents picking up their own sons and daughters you can’t get your boss’s words out of your head, recalling him saying, “You know, when I’m in a meeting I’m always the smartest person in the room. You… well, you don’t have that problem.” Ugh. At once you are concerned about your position. A single mom, you simply can’t lose your job! How will you pay your mortgage? What about your daughter’s music lessons? Oh my! What about health insurance?
Waiting in the long line of cars your engine warning light blinks on. “Of course,” you say to yourself as you repeatedly drum the steering wheel with your fingers. At last you reach the head of the line and your daughter jumps into the car, trumpet in hand. She practices all the way to her lesson. Trumpets are pretty loud. No, that’s not right. Trumpets, especially in the confines of a car, are deafeningly loud. Though you feel your temples beginning to throb, in no way will you squelch your daughter’s enthusiasm by asking her to keep it down.
After dropping her off you stop by the market for a few groceries. Your card is declined… again. Off to the ATM, then back to the store. You feel your face flushing with embarrassment as you pay the cashier.
But oh - at last you arrive home! Your castle. Your relief. A place of solace. You’re greeted at the door by the new pug puppy you recently rescued - “Uhura.” Uhura is really happy to see you and you realize it’s the first time you’ve felt appreciated all day. Now Uhura, well, she’s a puppy and with that comes fresh poop on the rug.
Still, you’re home. In your castle. Your relief. A place of solace. You have two hours before you will need to collect your daughter; plenty of time to “collect” yourself. In recent months you’ve been practicing mindfulness as a way of providing focus and stress relief. If ever there was a day that demanded a little stress relief, this is it…
*********
Oh friends… can relate to our heroine? Have you had days like this? I know I have. As you consider similar experiences you’ve had I ask you to pause for a moment and look around your home. In of itself does it provide relief and solace or conversely does it contribute to your anxiety? Perhaps it simply, blandly exists.
Hmmm… let’s put that “large” question aside and ask instead, is there a place in your home that will enhance your practice of mindfulness? A place you can meditate or perhaps engage the contemplative tradition? Maybe you just need a place you can quietly, calmly read.
Pause now for a moment and look around.
As I discussed in the opening section for these Stories, I believe that Architecture has the ability to enhance the things we are doing. To make our activity more robust, even if that activity is a quest for deep peace. Think about that. A robustly peaceful place in your home. A place that enhances your quest for mindfulness. A place that makes reading better. A place for quiet contemplation. It is not too much to expect.
I’m guessing that as you pause and look around your home you won’t find such a place. If you’re lucky there might be a place that won’t distract from, or impede your practice and quest for peaceful calm. If you’re lucky.
And so we ask ourselves, “what are the characteristics of a good place for mindfulness?” Or, borrowing from one far wiser than I am, “what does a place for mindfulness want to be?” I love that. What does a place for mindfulness want to be? It’s almost a way of seeing a place as being alive. Who knows, perhaps in some ways it is.
Although each of us will have answers to this question that are unique to our own situation and needs, you might be surprised to discover that across a large sample of people there will be many, many similar answers. Within the worlds we create for ourselves we humans often share more than we realize.
What does “a place for mindfulness” want to be? (If mindfulness isn’t your drive, perhaps you prefer meditation or contemplative practice. Or maybe you are looking for a place you can peacefully read or study.) Grab a piece of paper or open your Notes app and jot down five to seven points that strike you as important. For each point write 3 or 4 sentences that explain why it seems important and how you might implement it. Remember, there are no wrong answers.
This might take a while… I’ll wait…
Continues with Part 2